A Pick-Me-Up

My mother and what I call my second mother send me letters on a regular basis. I get letters for a the holidays, and then just because. The ones your not expecting are my favorite. I recently got my tongue pierced which, or course, did not make the parents happy in the least. It had the opposite effect actually. Finally I thought they got over it and understood that there isn't much they can do about it, until I picked up one of those unexpected letters.

I open this card my mom has sent me and it looks completly normal on the front, green with pink writting saying that I am a nice, gererous, beautiful person, one of those cards you can expect from your mother. Then I opened it and laughed for a good 5 minutes. Inside it said "Please don't get anything else pierced." Where did she find this card, I have no idea! It made me giggle for the rest of the day. Recieving mail is a good start to a day, as long as it's not a bill, but recieving mail that means something and causes you happiness is a supreme pick-me-up.

To Feel Alive Again

This person takes an odd outlook on being in love. Having a broken heart correlates to being in pain and desperation. If this person feels more alive when they have a broken heart they must expect life to give them nothing but hard times. Do they believe that life is meant to be horrible, they are destined to be in pain? They believe love is a fantasy world, somewhat like a dream they are floating through, a Neverland of sorts. It is something that always must be destroyed eventually and one must wake up and join reality again.

I think it is sad for someone to have been pushed to the point where they can't even believe in love anymore. Though I am quite dissuaded that fairytale romanticism exists, i know there is love. What could someone have been through to feel this way?

Double Secret

This postcard was published on the PostSecret Website. A black and white image of a young girl looking off into the distance it saddens me at the first glance. Then to read the words, "My biggest secret isn't even my own. Maybe sending this post secret will release me. I've never told a soul your secret. I should have." Keeping a secret against all odds. What does hearing a secret do to the listener? Do they take on the burden and responsibility or the secret, tucking it away for later thoughts. Will this secret begin to eat at the listener the same way it did the confessor? How does the listener deal with the secrets they consume? Do they repent, or write, do they just wallow in sympathy for the confessor. They take on an emotional burden solely to relieve another person. Is confession selfish? Does the confessor ever think about what they are putting the listener through? We confess to relieve ourselves, to make ourselves feel better. What about the person we're confessing to?

Closer

The closer is another crime show that plays on prime-time TV, but this one deals entirely with confessions. The main character is called "the closer" and it is her job to get criminals to confess to their crimes. It is interesting to see how she pulls confessions out of people. She changes techniques from sympathetic and understanding, to forceful and bad-cop like, to a twisting, manipulative manner. In the end she almost always gets the confession out of the criminal. How does she deal with having to force these people to tell their secrets, especially with them being heinous crimes. Is it because she knows they will be prosecuted? Or does she just harden her heart...

Group Hug

Group Hug is a website similar to Not Proud where people can post their confessions for anyone to read anonymously. It is a way to free some of the burden a secret bears without affecting your day-to-day life. None you know would ever read that and know it's you, it is perfect.

An Impression

The documentary we viewed in class was brutally honest. These women in prison fulfilling long, grueling sentences feel remorse and regret for their actions, and they write about this among other topics in their writ ting group. It gave me a view into the minds of the people I thought were hardened criminals. When the prisoners spoke of their crimes it was a very deep, strong confession. Unlike those in PostSecret these confessions share the story behind the action. You get to see the emotions these memories evoke in the detainees and understand the events that led up to the action. I had a strong sense or pity for these women after they shared their crimes and how they felt about them.

It was distressing when the woman said she believed she only stabbed that old man 3 times, yet it was really 28 and she had to face that fact and his entire family in court. I felt sympathy for her and the other inmates, which is something I never expected to feel about a woman in jail.

My Words

Words are the way we communicate. We share our emotions, thoughts, ideas, actions. I want my words to be percise. I want to be able to convey thoughts or idea with clarity and emphasis, with a concise statement that leaves the listener enlightened. I want to eliminate rationalizations and use a firm descision-making process to create the best story. I want not only to be able to get the thought across clearly and concisly, but to be able to touch the listener.

To be able to reach the listener's heart and touch their soul is what makes a lasting impact. I want to be empathetic and leave a lasting impression. I wish my words to have meaning and ignite spiraling thoughts in others, to be the one who makes them understand. My words need to be pertenant to hear, they must be entertaining and viable.

I want everyone to love my words. I want everyone to feel my words. I want everyone to understand my words.

Listen

"Do You Want to Know a Secret?" - The Beatles

You'll never know how much I really love you

You'll never know how much I really care

Listen

Do you want to know a secret

Do you promise not to tell, whoa oh, oh

Closer

Let me whisper in your ear

Say the words you long to hear

I'm in love with you

Listen

Do you want to know a secret

Do you promise not to tell, whoa oh, oh

Closer

Let me whisper in your ear

Say the words you long to hear

I'm in love with you

I've known the secret for a week or two

Nobody knows, just we two

Listen

Do you want to know a secret

Do you promise not to tell, whoa oh, oh

Closer

Let me whisper in your ear

Say the words you long to hear

I'm in love with you

Not Proud

www.notproud.com

This website, which is no longer being updated, reminds me of PostSecret. It is a site which you could post your confessions anmoyusly for anyone to read. It is subdivided into eight subcategories; pride, envy, sloth, gluttony, greed, lust, anger, and miscelaneous. The confessions range from ording a pizza for your wife then eating it instead, to hacking into computer systems. This site provided a way for people to rid the burdens of their everyday secrets, lies, confessions, and regrets.

And How Does That Make You Feel?

I sat down at my dest one day trying to feel creative. There was a box of every colored sharpie anyone could want, and a 4 X 6 postcard just as blank as when I got it. How do you decide what secret to write down? Non of my secrets seemed as big or meaningful as all those poor people in the book. I didn't have a friend die, loose a major job interview, I just lived out a normal life. Then I start thinking about regrets, and suddenly I became enlightened because one intance comes straight to my mind. But how to put it down? Who will see this postcard, and what will they think of me? Will they judge it, and what story will they put to the picture. I was nervous for a stranger to see something so intimate to me, yet excited at the same time. Will sending this postcard really lift the burden of my regret?

Well, I don't know if I feel better about what I had done, nor if I will ever forget; however, I feel happier. It lightened the load, I was no longer the sole human being to know this little fact. Is sending a postcard to PostSecret theraputic? Yes. Will it solve all your problems? No.

Depression

A Poem about confessing to have depression...

Confession

Submitted by Christina
E-mail: beautifulgurl_88@hotmail.com

I have a confession.
Please forgive me.
I'm afraid that my disease is coming back.
Piece by piece.I'm falling apart.
It's slowly taking over my mind and my thoughts.
It keeps on telling me what to do.
I try not listening to it
I try to ignore it but I'm to weak.
I'm a weak girl.
I cannot fight this disease.
I pretend that everything is okay.
I smile to people, look at them in the eye
lieing to their face
telling them that I'm fine.
Shall I confess
or shall I keep forever this secret in me ?
What will they think ?
What will they say ?
Will this disease take over me ?
Take over my mind ?
Take over my thoughts ?
Will it take over me..completly ?
Question after question-non stop.
Answeres-never.
I believe that this life is a big dream.
I feel like I'm stuck in this big dream...
stuck in a nightmare.
When will I wake up :(
I'm scared.
This nightmare is really scaring me.
But I shouldn't worry it's just a dream
which is almost over !
This is almost over...
my life is almost over.
There's nothing left for me to live for.
I'm just a sad girl.
I'm just a depressed girl.
They dont know what's going in my head.
They think I'm okay.
I cannot take it anymore.
When will I wake up ?
So there you have it...
I confessed you my biggest secret.
Forgive me again.
Sorry for the lies and the fake smiles
and saying that I was okay when I really wasn't.

Invasion

Postsecret is unlike any book I have previously encountered. Compiled of hundreds of secrets, I felt very uneasy reading it. It is hundereds of minuete pieces of information about peoples lives, and not just any information but the pieces they have never told anyone. It gives you a looking glass into the deepest thoughts of a stranger and each postcard weaves a story around the image. I find myself wondering who is this person, how did they hear about postsecret, and what are the circumstances behind this secret. I kept trying to understand and relate to these people I have never met and then find myself feeling like I am standing in their bubble.

Why did people send in their secrets or confessions to Postsecret? Is it relieving, a way to get something of your chest, or is it just intriguing. It is similar to the idea of a confessional booth because you are telling a secret, confession, or sin to a stranger who will not judge you. Is that why these people will tell the world on a postcard but not their closed friends or family, are they too scared to be judged? To have suce a large, complete collection od confessions is amazing because in scociety you hardley even hear someone utter sorry.

Will This Help?

Church is a place where many people to seek relief from everyday troubles, sins, and in many cases regrets. This woman who is praying in a confessional is looking to gain something from this experience. Is she expecting a hand to reach down and fix everything or just a reassuring pat on the back. Does she actually believed talking about her sins will wipe the slate clean, is she worried about being able to go to heaven?

I do not understand why going to confession will better lives. It is nothing more than an elaborate confession, one a person is not confortable telling anyone except a servant of God. The only time I have ever visited a confessional was in the Vatican in Vatican City. I was in there talking to some person who knew nothing about me, my feelings, or my lifestyle. How is this going to make me feel any better? Lo-and-behold, I tell him a few tidbits and in consequence feel like a complete idiot for sharing my innermost thoughts with a total stranger. Wouldn't it be more sucessful if you confessed to a friend or family mamber, and why is everyone so scared to do this?